On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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