I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
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