Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
