Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Randomize
