Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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