im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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