i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
