What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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