i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
