Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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