So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Even my vagina gasped.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize