So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
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