Pappa wants mamma naked
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize