i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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