with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
