i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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