Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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