is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
