When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
