you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
