I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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