its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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