girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Randomize