Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
