i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
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