i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
