btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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