I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
