So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
