I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
