Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(519): View more from Ontario

I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.

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(210): View more from Texas

I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano

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(917): View more from New York City

She saved the condom from the first time we did it.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome

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(815): View more from Illinois

its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face

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(314): View more from Missouri

Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.

(618): View more from Illinois

You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"

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