Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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