But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
and you fell through a lawn chair
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize