Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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