Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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