He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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