This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
