At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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