If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize
