So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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