I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
