Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
