I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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