i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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