I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
