on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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