question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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