I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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