The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Liz is crying about burritos again.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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