I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
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