I smell stomach acid.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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